Everybody needs some relationship advice from time to time. When you go through a breakup, it can feel like everything has come crashing down around you. Chances are you’ll seek out advice from friends, but it doesn’t always do the magic.
There is only one way to recover from a breakup, let time heal the pain. But if you’re struggling to see that things get better, there are a few books from relationship experts that can help you get through the painful experience.
Blinkist gave us 12 of the most-highlighted snippets from some of the best books about relationships.
Maybe you’re pondering what to do differently next time, or you keep blaming yourself for the breakup. no matter what it is, there’s probably a piece of advice from the list that may be of help.
Getting past your breakup by Susan J. Elliott
“Think about where you’d like your personal life to go. How was your previous affair holding you back? In what ways would you like to enjoy your freshly acquired freedom?”
‘How to fix a broken heart’ by Guy Winch
“Others’ lack of knowledge is bad for us. it makes us internalize their nonchalance. As a consequence, we start judging and shaming ourselves for feeling the way we do.”
‘He’s just not that into you: The no-excuses truth to understanding guys’ by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo
“At the end of the day, men prefer to get what they want. So, if he’s really into you, you’ll realize it, because he’ll actively make the effort to chase you in order to win you over.”
‘Games people play” by Eric Berne
“People play games with one another every day: complex, often instinctive interactions that disguise the true motives and goals of the players. fuelled by their fear of intimacy, players can remain stuck in games all their lives. But by learning about the many games and their hidden dynamics, we can cut loose their bonds and create honest, meaningful human connections.”
‘The all-or-nothing marriage’ by Eli J. Finkel
“Real compatibility requires work on the part of both partners, and it comes down to aiding each other or supporting the other’s goals, and having the eagerness to sacrifice and make compromises.”
‘The 7 principles for making marriage work’ by John M. Gottman and Nan Silver
“Romance endures when you signal that your significant other is loved during the monotony of daily life.”
‘How to be alone’ by Sara Maitland
“When you’re alone, you can focus on a deeper understanding of who you are and what matters to you. only by spending time alone, free of outside influences, can you discover these important parts of yourself.”
‘A general theory of love’ by Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, Richard Lannon
“If the people (usually parents) who influenced the development of our limbic prototypes were, during our childhood, themselves not emotionally developed, nor aware of their own emotional shortcomings, we’ll inherit their emotional problems.”
‘Daring greatly’ by Brene Brown
“Talking about our feelings of shame and naming them often diminishes their power. in fact, verbalizing our shame actually makes us resilient to it.”
‘Flow’ by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
“To live an optimal life, try not to be influenced by external rewards or the opinions of others. you can attain enjoyment in life by focusing your attention on every moment, being mindful of your environment and immersing yourself in your interests. finally, you should never avoid facing difficult challenges, as they can lead to personal growth and achievement.”
‘How to think more about se*’ by Alain de Botton
“We too should try to see our subject-the person we’ve chosen as a partner-afresh every day. once we start doing that, we’ll remind ourselves of why we fell for that person in the first place.”