Do you know it takes only a fifth of a second to fall in love and just about a tenth of a second to make a good first impression?
Consequently, you must be at your best game meeting someone you like for the first time. Especially on a first date, a good first impression can create an effect strong enough to last a lifetime.
Some psychologists postulate that it could take as little in time as three seconds for someone you are meeting for the first time to evaluate and form an impression of you. Just at a glance, a person may make an opinion about you based on what they see and perceive. Your body language, your demeanour, your mannerisms, and how you are dressed are all put into together and summed up.
You must have heard the saying “no one gets a second chance to make a good first impression”. First impressions say everything about you. Even very little things that may have gone unnoticed all add up, either as a plus or a minus. Everything counts on a first date. Below are some tips on how to create a good first impression on a first date.
1. Make sure to be on time
No excuse you give would ever be good enough for your not making it on time. Make that date the most important task you want to accomplish on the said date. Kick off as early as possible, taking into account possible delays in traffic any other eventualities. Arriving earlier would also help calm your nerves and make you feel more at ease.
2. Don’t try to be who you are not
In as much as making a good first impression requires you to act with utmost comportment. However by doing so, you should make sure to stay in the confines of your own limits. Do not lose yourself or pretend to be someone you are not. The only person you have mastered being is yourself. Trying to act like someone you are not would surely end disastrously.
Being yourself doesn’t mean you should continue being the jerk that you are to others or continue being fearful of others and live a hermit-like life, avoiding people just as you used to. That’s not who you really are. Take away the mask, labels and judgements you have placed on yourself. Feel at ease, be confident in who you truly are.
3. Be sensitive
Be yourself, express your thoughts on every subject but also listen. Listen with empathy and give your full attention to him/her. Be neutral, do not judge. Be sensitive to your date. When the conversation with your date is getting too emotional, retrace yourself. Be sure not to cross the red line. Try not to say anything that may hurt their feelings. While having a discussion about a particular topic, pay good attention to his/her facial expressions. Facial expressions communicate effectively what words cannot.
4. Find a common ground
Take time to listen attentively and learn something about him or her. Then relate what you have learned to yourself and find a connection. For example, he is very much actively into sports and you also have an interest in a particular sport. Talk about what you both love. This would make the conversation more interesting to you both and help maintain the flow.
5. Wear something hot
Going out on a date, most ladies take appearance very seriously. Most women would do with a lacy lingerie with a skin-tight skirt matching with sky-high stilettos and make-over – to add the glamour. But guys generally care a lot less about their appearance. Appearance counts a lot on a first impression. Dress neatly to look glamorous – not to exude excess appeal, so as not to give your date a wrong impression. Wear something comfortable and less revealing. Do light makeup. Wearing too much makeup makes you seem too artificial thereby undermining your realness. Guys who have facial hair should trim it properly as this greatly helps in boosting confidence levels. Also, nicely fitted clothing oozes attractiveness. Be sure to look good and smell nice.
6. Smile and laugh, it helps
A light welcoming smile makes your date feel much at ease and sets the perfect tone for a romantic date night. Laugh heartily at his or her jokes. By all means do what you can to liven up the mood. There is a saying that “smiling is a winner when it comes to great first impressions”. According to a survey conducted by Kelton Global on behalf of the American Academy of Cosmetic Dentistry, first positive impressions all come down to the power of an attractive smile. On a first date, a smile alone is powerful enough to seduce your date into feeling so much at ease with you.
7. Use all tools to communicate
Maintain the right amount of eye contact. Contrary to popular notions that we maintain eye contact as long as possible in conversations in order to be persuasive and strong, recent studies in psychology have found that to be erroneous. Studies have shown that locking eye contact for too long makes other persons sense a forced dominance – which seems too confrontational.
Quit beating around, be direct with what you intend to say. Ask direct questions. Where you are lost, say it plainly. Avoid tentative jokes or conjectural lines as much as you can.
8. Work on your confidence
Keep your mind open, don’t over think it. Be yourself, prepare your mind for the conversation. Understand that it is completely natural to feel nervous on a first date. Think positive, there must be something that they admire in you that made them agree to going out with you in the first place. With the few tips from 1 to 7 above, you shouldn’t feel so tensed anymore. If possible, call a good friend to cheer you on. Dating should be fun right? So quit the thinking that you are going to meet your “Mr/Mrs right” straight away. Enjoy the time out, make new friends and see how it goes.