No one ever wants to be alone. It is only natural to have feelings for someone and pray they love us back in return. In fact, no one truly enjoys the single life. And this could be the reason why as soon as we get into a new relationship, we feel super excited wanting to shout it from the rooftop. We feel tempted to share every detail of our relationship to anyone who cares to listen. Recently, this habit is becoming more trendy especially on social media. As soon as we get a positive response or soon after being asked out, we rush to update our facebook relationship status.
We may just want to let the whole world know how happy we are. But sometimes, we do this only to satisfy our ego. To prove to others that we are also capable of being loved. To make our friends jealous or get back at an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. Truth is, more people feel sad about you falling in love than the ones who are genuinely happy for you. Surely, your crush will feel heartbroken. Your ex will be tormented with mixed feelings of regret, heartbreak, and jealousy. Some friends will naturally be jealous and gossipers will have a new topic to talk about.
However, making your relationship status public or sharing every detail of your relationship on social media may pose serious negative consequences on your love life.
Relationship expert and dating consultant Stacie Ikka says displaying your true relationship status on Facebook isn’t really a bad idea, but there are instances when it’s smart to keep a little secret especially as pertains who you are dating from your online circles.
1. Your partner may not be cool with it
Posting certain stuff about your partner may make them feel uncomfortable though they may never say. “You can post things that are personal about you if you want, but don’t post things that are personal about your significant other because it becomes an invasion of their privacy,” says clinical sexologist and relationship expert Dawn Michael, Ph.D. “Be aware of the relationship outside of yourself. Don’t post anything personal about your significant other unless they do it themselves.”
2. You put your private life on the public domain
The more of your private life you put into the public domain, the smaller your private life becomes.
It is he who wears the shoe that knows where it pinches. Quite so, but now every internet troll has a say about your relationship. If for instance, you are having a quarrel, someone who barely knows you and has very little details about your love life would take it upon himself to never let you forget – deliberately trying to belittle and upset you the more. In the end, you may become just another subject of ridicule and gossip.
3. It leads to more questions
You started it all. Now they want to know everything, they are gonna be asking more questions like “So, did you finally have sex?” And offering advice when you didn’t ask for any. But how far are you willing to go? How much information about you and your partner are you willing to spill out just to appease your fans? That’s where you will have a problem. That’s the point you will start living your relationship on the social media.
4. You have indirectly bound yourself in chains
If all your social media friends or fans have so many details about your relationship, then you are never going to move past any argument. You constantly seek their approval to enjoy your relationship the way you want. You let internet trolls become the judges of your private life – a life they don’t know any much about. They make their deductions from their perspectives and sometimes even maliciously, in order to spite you. Their flawed opinions become your ideal standard. And when things begin to go wrong, the first thing to come to your mind will be “what will everyone say”.
5. You place unnecessary pressure on yourself and your relationship
Understand that no relationship is ever flawless and stop pretending that yours is. Posting details of your relationship on the social media place unnecessary pressure on your relationship. You will be living in a limbo – fighting so hard between the future and the past. Between what you or your partner wants and what your fans are saying. Sometimes you’ll get stuck in past arguments, other times you’ll have unrealistic expectations. All of these gravely affect your relationship in a negative way and is not really worth it.
Yes, you are the social type and it’s hard keeping your relationship a secret. And no one is trying to contest that. Nonetheless, there is a difference between “secrecy” and “privacy”. Keep your relationship a little bit more private. Not everyone deserves to know everything about you. This reduces external pressure, places your relationship on the right path and you can both move your relationship at the pace that suits you both.