Marriage is a beautiful thing, so said the good books and some happily married people, but not to all who go through all sorts of not too good experiences. To these group of people, marriage was a big mistake.
We are meant to believe that marriage is a journey started by a journey before it, I will explain this way; in as much as the ceremonies and celebrations that come with marriages mark the beginning of a new love journey between two hearts; who have agreed and bounded by love for each other to live together forever, prior to the ceremony which actually kicks off the marriage journey, there are necessary stages to marriage starting from courtship (friendships, falling in love and being in relationships). The above is only a normal and perhaps ancient way which to a large extent has produced a lot of successful marriages today. In recent times though, the case has slightly taken a different look as broken marriages and divorces are more popular than birthdays. Below is a few highlighted reasons why married couples fall in love again:
HAPPILY MARRIED IS JUST A PHRASE
These days words means almost nothing and most people only use phrases whichever way the please without really doing what they say. In similar manner most marriages from a distant view appear so perfect especially when the said couple is of the goal to make the public believe they are happy, while in reality their life compared to what they portray is an irony. Often, what you see is not what really is, like we were taught to never judge a book by its cover as you can only know the true content of the book when you’ve seen its contents. Marriages sometimes could be likened to celebrity lifestyle; where you only see the perfect sides of people while their imperfect and disgusting reality live behind the scene.
In summary, married couples may appear happy but in actual reality, they are going through hell. Happily married like every other phrase is open to change since words are not constants, especially when the necessary ingredients in marriage fade away. If this be true, it can be so very easy for a spouse to fall in love with someone else who may have appeared to be better.
COUPLES GET BORED
Boredom is not only limited to other aspects of life, it also have its roots in marriages mostly when they neglect their roles and fail to own up to their responsibilities. Ordinarily, boredom does not come in to play in situations on its own, it is rather created by people in different levels of life and couples are not left out here. I always remember this line learn about your spouse every day and always figure new ways to express your love, failure to adhere to this gradually creates a welcoming environment for boredom. Boredom may not be much destructive in other situations, but it is far worse than anything you can think of among married couples. It can lead to a gradual deterioration and interest on each other. When eventually this happens, happily married couples become unfriendly and less attractive to themselves. And at this point, it may not be so difficult for married person to fall in love with someone who is close, funny and a lot lively than their spouse.
FREQUENT CONTACT WITH OPPOSITE S*X
Not only at work, places where people spend more time than they spend at home can be a source of negative influence. Frequent contact and communication with coworkers, friends can make a married person to have and develop feelings for their colleagues in the office. This mostly happens if for instance the person in question works almost always with this colleague; solving problems together, gracing victories and awards while working together. Erroneous thoughts like if we are so good at work together, why not in a relationship? If these thoughts are not shut off immediately, they develop gradually without your notice and finally mature to a point where they can no longer be controlled.
Like people develop the habit of stealing, reading, working effectively and eventually become professionals in whichever field they’ve chosen to commit their time and effort. In similar manner marriage is a continuous lifelong process which demands growth and improvement to survive, a habit of always wanting to make your marriage perfect should be cultivated in couples who want to remain married and in love with their spouse. A habit of always trying to understand your spouse, being patient, tackling issues and solving problems together, sharing ideas and making your spouse a part of all activities you are involved in make it easier to stay in love think less of considering someone else taking his or her place in your heart. If any of these habits is lacking in married couples, each of them stand a compromising chance of falling in love with someone else who has the right habits all intact.
COUPLES STOP LEARNING
The wise quote the day you stop learning you die has proven its effectiveness in all life’s concerns and marriage is one them. In whatever you do in life, whenever you place a pause on learning new ideas and tips in that field, its end is near. Among married couples, learning is needed much more than in colleges, progress and growth of any marriage is dependent on how much couples learn about themselves and marriage itself. When married, some women stop learning how to dress impressively to attract their husbands; and sometimes limit the extent which they take good care of their bodies.
Surprises and new ways to express love to your wife keeps the sweetness alive in among couples. A stop in learning how to stay married and appreciate your spouse maximizes the chance of a married person falling for someone other than their spouse and this is because a new lover comes with a fresh burning desire to please you.
GREED AND DISCONTENTMENT
My affair with you does not put you anywhere near the position of my wife, I love my wife so much and can’t afford to lose her says a cheating husband to his mistress. Whenever greed drags you into cheating on your marriage when you can always avoid it, you are gradually drifting away and risking the love you have for your spouse on the line. Contact with the opposite s*x takes you off your happy home faster than you can ever imagine. Women equally face similar challenges when they allow greed and lust push them into cheating on their marriages. Be contented with who you have chosen to be your spouse for there is no extra gain in greed. But it will only make you fall in love with someone else who is not your spouse.
Communication is everything in marriage. Talking about all you marriage challenges and sharing good experiences of an activity or work with your spouse is a great way to remain connected. If for any reason your happily married life reaches a point where you can’t discuss issues with your spouse; meeting people of opposite s*x who perfectly do what your spouse is unable to do (effective communication especially) increases your chances of falling in love with such person.
S*x is a very serious business and has the capability to either grow any marriage or destroy it if not properly handled. Some people love s3x too much while others just don’t like that much; in a situation where two people with conflicting desire for s*x meet in marriage, there might be a problem which may push one to having secrete affair. It may be difficult when faced with this kind of challenge but in all; understanding can perfectly remedy the situation as one can gradually learn to get use to their partner’s desires. Being married simply means you put your spouse’s needs above yours and do all that is within your reach to make them happy. Most broken marriages come as a result of poor s*x and if this problem is not dealt with absolute wisdom and understanding, married people can destroy their union when they go in search of satisfaction outside their marriage.